Friday, April 26th, 2019
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Life is about living not existing and if you are sitting around waiting for something to happen (good or bad) you are wasting your value. We all have a value in this chaotic universe, and it is up to each of us to travel a path that defines us. As a child, my parent’s tried to mold my brothers and me into the images that they thought would not only be good for us but would make them look good. That was the mindset in the ’50s, ’60s and even into the ’70s. However, when the baby boomers like myself started families, many of us took another direction. In fact, many of us rebelled openly or silently during the ME GENERATION of the ’70s and ’80s. We chose to change career paths, divorce more openly, and learn to find our inner happiness. We still loved and respected our parents; however, maturity and growth introduced us to various pathways.
I was more of the silent rebellion, however majoring in communications when my parent’s expectation was education, was an obvious one that did not sit well with my mom and dad. What women/female was ever going to make in the broadcasting/communications industry? (I think they were short-sighted.) I also chose divorce at an early age rather than stay in a loveless marriage, and I ended up re-marrying someone of a different faith! (Again, this was not the path my momma and pop had wished for me.) My parent’s watched me struggle with my identity from an early age on, never fitting in where I wanted to be accepted, and often feeling the “Oh woe is me syndrome.” I never felt smart enough, pretty enough, or anything enough. I worked hard to prove that I was acceptable, but not to myself, to everyone else.
Today I am living for me while engaging with those I love, like, and want to meet. There is a limitless amount of experiences, and I am not going to waste what minutes, hours, days I have left dreaming about the person I want to be. Not every moment will be filled with excitement or joy, but I will learn to accept heartache and sorrow as my stepping stones throughout this journey.