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It’s Almost that TIME

Rich and I will be arriving tomorrow afternoon sometime – we are staying at Anne’s Washington Inn.  If any of you are playing around town tomorrow night please post it to me on Facebook as we may try to make the rounds, Marcus, Jeff, Steve, etc., …

Also, anyone who has not done a podcast with us and still has an interest please contact me and let me know, we will continue to do stories after May 19th

In the meantime, I plan to be at Uncommon Grounds Saturday morning around 10 am if you or anyone you know wants to stop by.  I am anxious to see Terri-Lynn’s photography.

Sunday is going to be an exciting and full-packed day – I cannot wait to see everyone, hear you all perform and for you to meet my inspiration, my son Alex, who has been inspired by Charlie Eble, https://www.spreaker.com/user/10697139/alex-hale-talks-charlie-ebe-4-28-19

If you haven’t listened to these tributes take a few minutes/ or more to listen https://www.spreaker.com/show/charlie-eble-day-may-19-2019-cafe-lena

To Touch or Not To Touch – that is the question!

I am asking because I am confused!  When is friendly too friendly?  In the past, family, friends, neighbors, and newly acquainted individuals hugged, touched, and even kissed, without sexual intent or disrespect of invading space.  Most of the baby boomers were brought up in an environment was touch appropriate; it was for comfort, appreciation, as well as a common form of communication.  I am not disavowing that some of these connections may go array whether intentionally or with intent.  However, when did we get so sensitive to expect that a kiss on the head, hand, the cheek is something more than a mere gesture of respect or showing appreciation.  Why is it ‘OK’ for men to hug and tap each other on the shoulder but when a man treats a female equally it is considered too personal and display sexually desire?.

I do not want to live in a world where people are afraid to touch each other or share a conversation that may each work and innuendo is scrutinized.  The “ME TOO MOVEMENT” has does a wonderful thing by bringing inappropriate behavior to the forefront; however, it has destroyed what is natural in the human species, connection.  I am not defending or accusing anyone of poor behavior while we must begin to understand that not everything communicated is in “poor or inappropriate taste,” we should be cognizant of what is acceptable in a human connection.

 

I have shared this previously, I have been molested by a member of the medical community, the therapy taught me to how to get through the remnant of that encounter while learning to trust my instincts while still welcoming appropriate touch and speech when making a connection.  Do we want to live in a world of “Hands Off?”  If so, when will experience the warmth of another human soul?

Sharing is Caring especially when it comes to AUTISM

The following is something I read on Facebook today, although I do not know this mother personally, I understand her story all to well.  I believe her story, as I have seen this all too familiar scenario played out due to ignorance as well as unawareness to our special needs community.  Our communities are not comprised of all perfectly “normal” human specimens.  In fact, the quote that normal is only a setting on a washing machine or dryer is very true.  As we are all snowflakes, not one of us is identical to another, we all have our quirks.

When will we learn to be tolerant, accepting, and encompass the diversities we encounter on a daily basis?  When trusted medical doctors, nurses, and other healthcare officials cannot be trusted, it is time to change the system.  Approximately 17 years ago a Psychiatrist at the Cuyahoga County Board of Mental Retardation, informed my son (who was 11 at the time), my husband and myself, that he (our son) should give up his dreams and passion for baseball.  She told him his dreams were too lofty and that he was destined to living in a half-way house and performing menial jobs.

As parents, we refused to listen, and we argued with her that she was wrong despite a complete case study she provided us with to prove her point.  Today, not only did my son graduate high school with a 3.0+ GPA, attend college and receive a BS in Business Management, he has also been an Autism Advocate, and for over a year he has worked with the Cleveland Indians and has accepted two advancements.  He is living his passionate dream despite the ignorance of a “trusted” professional.  If we had listened and given into her diagnosis (not the one of our son’s neurologist) we would have not only ruined our son’s life but destroyed much of ours as well.

Anyone who knows someone on the spectrum most likely has a similar story, and we must continue to bring the REAL SPECTRUM AWARE to light.  April may be Autism Awareness Month, but for the one out of sixty-four and their families, Autism Awareness must be every day.  #IGNORANCENOTACCEPTED! #webothhavesonsbythenameofAlex

 

APRIL IS AUTISM AWARENESS/ACCEPTANCE MONTH
Why this is so important to me and many of my very dear friends…

Our story that changed me forever…

June 2015 Alex had a horrible sinus infection. He was in terrible pain, but because his verbal skills are limited, he did not know how to express how he was feeling. All he knew is he needed relief from the pain. He ended up hitting himself which resulted in 2 black eyes. As my poor “Gentle Giant” baby was lying in bed that night, his eye started to bleed. Although I was very skeptical on how he would be treated there I knew (thought) he needed to go to the hospital where they would give him something to make him feel better.  And that my friends is where Alex and my Horrific Nightmare Began…

Before this, I think we kind of lived in a bubble. Beachwood is kind of a small town where most people know each other. So most people knew Alex for the funny, smart, fun loving, Gentle Giant he is. On top of that, he attended an Autism School. So acceptance in the community was just part of our world. Never did I imagine he would go to a hospital 10 minutes away from our house where the minute he came through the doors, he was treated like a monster.

All these doctors saw was a 6’4” man with 2 black eyes not happy. They didn’t care that he was not happy because he was in pain. When I told them he had autism, they actually said to me “We have never had anyone here with autism before” I called Bullshit on them. “Really? 1 in 64 and he is your first?”

They put him in 4 point restraints and sedated him. They would not treat his sinus infection even though I insisted. I stayed with him 24/7. I slept in a metal folding chair and only left for a couple each night when someone I trusted at the time would come so I could shower. I heard and saw everything that went on. I would tell them he is in pain. I would beg them to give him something for his pain. They would say “He is sedated he doesn’t feel anything” I could see he was in pain. They didn’t care. To them, he wasn’t a person. He got pneumonia and ended up on a ventilator. This went on for 3 WEEKS! I fought with them, I yelled they DIDN’T CARE!! I tried telling them what a wonderful boy he is. THEY DIDN’T CARE!! To them he was a very large disabled “monster” The doctors would talk around me. Like I wasn’t there. They told me if he got out they wanted to send him to a mental hospital. They treated him like a crazy monster. They didn’t care; I was his mother and legal guardian. They acted like I knew nothing about him. They didn’t believe anything I told them. Me and others that saw him never said the words but knew he was going to die there. They were going to kill him. I begged for him to get transferred out of there. I thought of ways to sneak him out. Finally, after 3 weeks, they sent him by ambulance to the main Clinic where after 2 more weeks they were able to get him off the ventilator. He was left immobile. They wanted to send him to rehab, and I said “NO. NO MORE. I WILL DO ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING TO HAVE HIM REHAB AT HOME!”

Thank God Alex has the Fershtman determination and hard work ethic. It took a while but he had to learn to walk and feed himself again. And most importantly he had to learn to TRUST again.
He had nightmares from this experience. I slept with him every night for 1 year. I still have nightmares. And unlike Alex, I have not learned to trust again.
You know how they say “Once you are in Hell nothing else frightens you” It is true. I was there and I do not get intimidated by anything anymore. Alex and I are both fighters. We are survivors. If we made it through Hell we can make it through anything!
Even making this move. I knew it was the best thing for both of us but I thought the transition might be a little hard for him. However, I knew we would get through it. If we survived our horrific nightmare we would survive transition issues. Thankfully he has been so happy here since day one! I promise This will NEVER HAPPEN TO ALEX AGAIN! I WILL DO ANYTHING AND I REALLY MEAN ANYTHING TO MAKE SURE IT DOESN’T!! And I also promise I will make sure everybody will always treat him as the sweet, loving funny person he is!

AND WE AS A COMMUNITY NEED TO MAKE SURE THAT WHAT HAPPENED TO ALEX NEVER EVER HAPPENS TO ANYONE AGAIN!!!

REMEMBER, PEOPLE WITH DIFFERENT NEEDS ARE STILL PEOPLE AND DESERVE TO BE TREATED AS PEOPLE!!! NOBODY’S LIFE IS WORTHLESS BECAUSE THEY HAVE ANY KIND OF SPECIAL NEEDS!!!

And I don’t care who you are if I hear you say otherwise I will call you out on it every time!!!

THIS IS NOT A POLITICAL STATEMENT SO PLEASE DON’T MAKE IT ONE!
THIS IS A STATEMENT ABOUT PEOPLE PERIOD!!!
AND A STATEMENT ABOUT AUTISM AWARENESS AND ACCEPTANCE!!

ps. I cannot promise that this is my only Autism Post this month… so Buckle Your Seatbelts Kids!!

***Annette Scott & Sandi Fershtman – thank you for sharing and now let’s home we can touch the hearts of humanity (and medical professionals) to understand that Autism touches us all!

 

Could a, Would a, Should a – Follow the Path 2 Day!

Good morning world, it is Saturday, March 30th, just two days before April 1st, also known as April Fools Day!  Well, I don’t plan to fool you or anyone else, what I am planning to do is to fully continue living my life and appreciate each sunrise and sunset even if it is Cloudy & Grey.  As I look at the various messages on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram I am reminded that we only have one life to live and that is now in the present.  We can think of the could a’s, should a’s and would a’s but that would mean something else would have transpired and we cannot guarantee that is the result we would want.  However today we can choose the path and take the journey of life and see where it leads.  Remember every path as curves, turns, ups and downs, the obstacles are what gives us the strength to sort through these challenges.

Supporting Each Other in Harmony

Well, it has been a whirlwind around here both in the house of the HALE family as well as newclevelandradio.net.  March is birthday month for both my husband and me, and I am exactly three weeks older than him almost to the minute.  Richard (my husband of thirty-five years,) is my best friend.  When you spend 35 years with someone as intimately as we have there are days when you hate (ok, dislike) the person you love.  We both have had our share of those days, but love in our case does conquer all!

In addition to birthday’s many of you know I have been battling the migraine issues again, and I am awaiting an appointment with a neurologist in April.  Not that I have wanted to wish March away but leaving the winter behind and finally getting the opportunity to find some answers for my headaches I will be glad to say good-bye to March (Madness.)

April looks exciting to me as the Cleveland Indians return on April 1st, for another fun season.  Although I am hoping for a winning one, I just enjoy the boys of summer, and I will not get into the politics of the game and players!  So let’s play ball!  Peanuts anyone?

In addition to baseball, newclevelandradio.net will be introducing a new show with local musician, comedian, and writer, Charlie Wiener.  Charlies is my favorite writer, and I am excited to say we will be discussing his books, his characters, who they truly are or are not and ask you our followers to read, listen and participate.

Also in the month to come, CARE NOTES with Doug Wilber from Cherished Companions returns.  New episodes on home care for the elderly, special needs, or even good old everyday assistance.  We have touched on this message in the past with so many of us living a fair distance from our loved ones, or unable to assist, businesses like Cherished Companions are a necessity, but they tend to do it as an award-winning organization.

Senior Moments will be returning as well, no official date has been set, but I understand Bradley and Heather Greene have a lot of new topics to cover as well as hear what is important to you.

My life is a blessing despite my migraines.  I am working with a variety of very interesting people, and every show delivers a message of hope with smiles, hugs, and friendship.  If we cannot provide a hand in person, we hope we are doing so virtually.

Our podcasts are now available on Spotify if you search the name of the podcast it will pop up for you or go to the page of the show to follow the link.  http://newclevelandradio.net/podcast-replays/

Happy Spring and let’s continue to support each other in harmony!

 

Remembering Baube Ida and Mr. Ed

60 years ago my Baube, Ida Olshansky Friedman, passed away, I was just nine years old.  Just days before I was in the car, my mom was taking Baube and Zayde on errands, and when we dropped them off at their apartment at Blackstone Manor, Baube promised they would see me for my birthday on March 4th.  However, I never saw Baube again.  She suffered a massive stroke the day before my 9th birthday and passed on March 9th, 1959.  Tonight according to Jewish tradition is her Yarzheit, I will light a memorial candle that will shine for 24 hours to remember her.  (The Yarzheit date is based on the Jewish date of passing.)

March 9th has another solemn significance as well, my father-in-law very much a father to me, passed away in 1987.  Edwin Peter Hale hung on through my birthday barely able to wish me a Happy Day, but in his humorous way congratulated me on my 39th year, two years early.  I will be 39 forever, thank you, dear Mr. Ed.

 

The loss may stay with us forever. However, it is time that allows us to look back and appreciate the love and special moments we were able to spend with one another.  As a young child, I spent many days with my Baube and Zayde.  I use to call them my old fashion grandparents as they never learned how to drive a car, and they share stories of the old country, Russia.  My zayde read the Yiddish paper (in Yiddish) and sprinkled Yiddish into his English conversations.  My Baube always appeared more American at least in my company she spoke only English.  She was a short, plump lady who could give you that soft loving hug even from across the room (or in your memories.)  She was a cook, a baker, but not a candlestick maker.  I loved her (and still do) despite our short time together.

My father-in-law was only in my life for a short time.  He also taught me love and share big bear hugs along with words of wisdom that he learned in the school of hard knocks.  Edwin was a gentle giant, and I am so blessed to call him father!

So today I remember life as it was 60 years ago and also 32 years ago and I hold their memories close to my heart and share with you that they were two special people who guided me on my path to today.

Time does heal sadness and loss; it doesn’t take it away it provides us a way to hold it near and dear with fewer tears and more smiles as we see the shadows that provide us strength.

EVERY SUNDAY is a New DAY and YOUR BIRTHDAY

It is Sunday, for many considered a day of rest that may consist of sleeping late into the late morning or early afternoon hours.  Years ago, Sunday was my lazy day, waking up to a new week, brunching or lunching with my husband, running errands in joyous harmony to GOLD CIRCLE™, prior to the TARGET™, days.  We always found a bargain or two while picking up the essentials like toilet paper, napkins, laundry soap as well other fine household items we didn’t need.  As we sauntered through the aisles we knew at the end of this weekly journey we would take our stash home and realize we forgot the most important item of the week, but we never identified what that item was!

Remember Yesterday – Live for Today

Those were the days when we first bought the Sunday newspaper, The Plain Dealer™, and cut out the coupons and checked out what was on sale before we stepped inside the doors of our Sunday retreat.  The newspaper was more golden than the GOLD CIRCLE™.  The Sunday edition was packed full of fun stuff like the comics in living color, and Parade Magazine™ that was sure to have a story of fun-filled information for reading, not scanning.  That paper went to breakfast with us, and we staled out our time as did many weeding through the paper from the front page headlines to the comics, magazines, ads, and flyers.  Great articles appeared in The Plain Dealer™, Jane Scott, Michael Heaton, Connie Schultz, Terry Pluto, and my friend Chuck Yarborough, just to name a few.

“Sunday, Sunday here again in tidy attire
You read the color supplement, the TV guide”

Today, Sunday is just another day, working; as most of us have more than one job in today’s economic debacle.  I feel blessed as I am about to reach the big 69 tomorrow that I am able and capable to be on my feet supporting sales and earning a few extra dollars.  I do this because I have learned through my upbringing that we must continue to venture through life and not only adapt to changes but to change for the betterment without bitterness.  I may have been raised in the 50s and 60s with the voice of encouragement telling me that if I worked hard, I too would have a suburban home, two cars in the garage and much more than just a chicken in the pot.  However, to maintain all that I was encouraged to work hard for comes with a price.


Appreciating Yourself so Others will Too!

I could complain that as I reach this pinnacle in life that I am still scratching and clawing to build a better lifestyle (not necessarily all financial), that will allow me to live fully.  That lifestyle includes working on Saturday and Sunday and meeting new people and supporting their wants and needs providing guidance.  My weekend gig is much like my weekday life with newclevelandradio.net, I work with various individuals, and I am their guide and support in sharing their message, compassion, and life providing us all options on which fork in the road will lead us to Sunday, the first day of the week.


Treat Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday

As the Days to Love Yourself and Wish Yourself

A Happy Birthday

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME

Tomorrow
March 4th

 

Happiness IS

 

Believe in happiness.  Life is a gift and what we do with each second is our choice.  We must remember that in order to live in a cohesive environment we must respect others as well as ourselves.  There is no complete solitude in the cosmos; we are uniquely engaging with life forms of various geniuses that we must be aware of and accommodate for the differences that can only make us stronger in our achievement of happiness.

 

Happiness is not just a mood with a smiling face, emoji.  It is a state of mind that we allow ourselves to experience and share.  It cannot be described as perfect or not; it is more like a choice to achieve satisfaction even on a grey and gloomy day.  It is important to understand that we cannot depend on anyone or anything to provide joyfulness.  We are the bearers of our own choices, and the results are defined by the path we take.

 

There is no right or wrong when we choose to live and achieve the best for ourselves while lighting the way for others to observe and follow if they wish.  However, our path is not the only one that will lead forward; there are many forks in the road.

 

 

 

 

 

Which one will you travel?

I Could Blame Charlie Wiener

 

I could blame Charlie Wiener for the fact that I am wide awake at 4:33 a.m., on a Sunday morning. However, it is because of Charlie that I am filled with the enthusiasm that life provides.  I am cherishing his writings in, American Stories, just as I did in the sequel, Carrie Come to Me Smiling.

 

 

Like the character Kim, we all have lived a life that too often we look back on and say; it’s not enough; my existence means nothing.  We may think that everyone is succeeding while we are barely capable to tread water.  Our accomplishments whether little or big have been buried in the crevices of our brain and we do not acknowledge them.  Instead for many of us, myself include, spelled in all CAPITAL LETTERS, wake up one day and ask is this LIFE?

 

 

Sadly for some, they run away from all that they have created, accomplished, and achieved, and try to start anew.  The truth is we cannot run away from ourselves, but we can learn from the past and remold ourselves.  We, you and I are the designers of this moment in time.  Nothing will change for the better or worse unless we mold the clay, pick up a paintbrush and add some color to the landscape or sketch out the inner feelings that may be holding us back from appreciating the beauty of life.

 

 

Some people wait until an event in their life rings a bell and allows the freedom to choose.  The bell may be a lottery winning or a diagnosis of what we may refer to as “ill”-fate.  The reality is a lottery winning may cause other ill-fated issues, whereas a diagnosis of dying is something we all live with from the moment we are born.  For some the end comes sooner than for others, but, it is up to each of us to make the most of each day and to not squander it away.

 

Our world is filled with books that tell stories some are fictional others are based on facts, research, and emotional concepts.  Reading can provide us with inspiration and a road map.  The road map is not going to be a straight line; it will have curves and ups and downs and detours as well as roadblocks.  However, it is up to us as the intelligent life form to find our way, not allowing the walls to close in on us.

 

Kim, the character in American Stories is on a path collecting stories, and although the strangers she meets are as different from her as night is to day, there is a commonality.  The commonality is that we are all trying to find, the comfort of peace within ourselves so we may enjoy the beauty that surrounds us.  This is what empowers me to share my journey with you and to create a platform where we come together as different individuals finding our sameness.  Charlie has captured my soul in his writing; I feel as if he is writing about me as well as you!

 

Empower yourself to live.  It is Sunday, February 24th, 2019, do not waste another minute.  My dear friend, Norman Tischler lived life to the fullest.  The riches he recently left behind are the people whom he touched, whether with his music, his words, a bear hug, or just a look that said, “I love you!”  I now belong to a world of strangers who are friends by association and the enthusiasm of being part of the story!

American Stories = Life

As I read American Stories, by K. Adrian Zonneville, aka Charlie Weiner, I now know that these books were written for a much deeper purpose than Charlie will ever understand, nor will I.  You see, when I chose to really live my life, not just go through the motions, I became interested in helping others in a manner in which my future would be enriched.  Enrichment is not in the form of financial gain, although a little extra in the pocket and bank might provide a little less of a burden, the love and friendships I am adding into my experiences here on earth are much more valuable.

As a young child, from the age of 9 or 10 years old, I struggled with making friends and being accepted.  Just prior to puberty I became gawky and unsure of myself.  I wanted so much to be part of the IN GROUP I literally pushed myself out of the inner circles.  However, looking back with hindsight, I was not totally on the fringe, I was somewhere between the core and edge, and if I had known what empowerment was, I may be a different person today.

My desire to be part of the click ate at my soul and caused me many embittered thoughts that I carried on my back that weighed me down.  I allowed my pre-pubescent years to hold me in a place that was not safe.  I did creep out of that maze of feelings throughout my life, but I kept getting pulled back like I was tethered to that time.  However, within the last five years I cut the teether and have begun running through the maze of life with hands up over my head, and every once in a while you may actually hear my shouts of ‘Glee.’

Reading American Stories, I understand that my mission in life is to experience and guide and be guided.  I am no longer living with clouded eyes and heart, I am open to awareness, and that is what empowers me.  I have no guarantees as to what tomorrow will bring, but I have the control to make each moment my best.  I must continue to breathe in the life that guides me!