Yesterday, July 15, 2023

Richard and I celebrated 39 years of marriage, but we’ve been together 41 years – as they say “Oy Vay!”  Rich and I are not much on celebrations.  In fact, in the early years, just as we are now, we were both working to make ends meet.  Sometimes we drive up to Detroit to see my family for a free dinner out, and other times it was my dear mother-in-law who always made sure we did something special.  That meant not going to McDonalds, but maybe to Pizza Hut for an all you can eat buffet.  (Do they still have that?)

Once Alex was born our celebration included him and we went out to entertain him more than ourselves.

This year was different.  For the first time in 32 years, we were alone for our anniversary.  Alex is working and living in Fort Worth and circumstances did not provide him with the opportunity to come home.  Steve was just here for Mother’s Day and truly he should be on vacation (he works too hard.)  However, last night we were joined for dinner with new friends Kristi & Rob (who are now our new family).  I met Kristi a year ago through an online group and despite our age differences and backgrounds growing up I know we are kindred spirits.  Dinner was fun as they got Rich to share stories on how we met (Thank you Iris, Lanny & Helene), how he proposed (a long story, anyone for a McDonald’s), and much more including his life before we met…

Kristi picked up on something I posted yesterday that it was our anniversary (not the original reason for going out), and gave us the sweetest loving card, but also had a piece of chocolate Oreo cake brought to the table with a candle.  The dinner and evening were wonderful, and it was simple.  (Kristi and Rob, we must do this again, before next year!!!)

I know for some birthdays and anniversaries are celebrated for days and I hear some celebrate the whole month.  We have never been like that, nor do I think we ever will be.  The reality is we love each other as well as like each other and spending our lives together is a celebration.  This year I missed so many of the people who were part of our celebration on July 15, 2024, including our parents who became friends and family over the years.  My in-laws and my mom and dad enjoyed the company of each other, and they would get together when they were both in Florida and when my parents came to visit us.

Sadly, in addition to our parents no longer being with us, we have experienced the loss of friends, and other relatives who made our day a true MITZVAH.  On that day I never thought we would experience the losses we have in 39 years.  Naïve as I was, I thought our parents would be with us year after year to continue to acknowledge the longevity of our marriage.

When we announced, we were getting married we had friends who swore we would never last.  Well to those who thought it or said it out loud, “Looks like we made it” despite the Manilow lyrics – we did not leave each other to find another.  In fact, our gift to each other was a renewal for yet another year.  We are on to 40!