21 February 2023

“𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, I’d like my family to hang this wish list up on the wall where I live. I want them to remember these things.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, I want my friends and family to embrace my reality. If I think my spouse is still alive, or if I think we’re visiting my parents for dinner, let me believe those things. I’ll be much happier for it.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, don’t argue with me about what is true for me versus what is true for you.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, and I am not sure who you are, do not take it personally. My timeline is confusing to me.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, and can no longer use utensils, do not start feeding me. Instead, switch me to a finger-food diet, and see if I can still feed myself.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, and I am sad or anxious, hold my hand and listen. Do not tell me that my feelings are unfounded.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, I don’t want to be treated like a child. Talk to me like the adult that I am.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, I still want to enjoy the things that I’ve always enjoyed. Help me find a way to exercise, read, and visit with friends.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, ask me to tell you a story from my past.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, and I become agitated, take the time to figure out what is bothering me.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, treat me the way that you would want to be treated.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, make sure that there are plenty of snacks for me in the house. Even now if I don’t eat I get angry, and if I have dementia, I may have trouble explaining what I need.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, don’t talk about me as if I’m not in the room.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, don’t feel guilty if you cannot care for me 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It’s not your fault, and you’ve done your best. Find someone who can help you, or choose a great new place for me to live.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, and I live in a dementia care community, please visit me often.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, don’t act frustrated if I mix up names, events, or places. Take a deep breath. It’s not my fault.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, make sure I always have my favorite music playing within earshot.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, and I like to pick up items and carry them around, help me return those items to their original places.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, don’t exclude me from parties and family gatherings.

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, know that I still like receiving hugs or handshakes..(easy on the hugs)

𝐼𝒻 𝐼 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝒶, remember that I am still the person you know and love.”

The best of me is gone.

Be with me and love me until I die.

(Thank Patti Girard)

If you don’t know anything about Lacrosse well…

Lacrosse is a team sports and considered the oldest organized sport in North America.  It is played with a Lacrosse Stick and a Lacrosse Ball.

Historical records indicate that the indigenous people of North America as early as the 12th century were playing this sport. The men’s teams play what is known as, Field LaCrosse, and they play this as both and indoor and outdoor sport.

“The modern sport is governed by World Lacrosse and is the only international sport organization to recognize First Nations bands and Native American tribes as sovereign nations”  (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lacrosse)

newclevelandradio.net is sharing this information as Alex Hale (owner of newclevelandradio.net) is working with the team and we have chosen to support them.

How to Super Age with Elise Marie Collins and her guest Barbara Graham_What Jonah Knew 1_25_23
https://youtu.be/6y0I9GMBZvg

What in the World with Paul Seaburn

and his sidekick John DiNallo 1_24_23 Season 6

https://youtu.be/kjX-W0LKJvM

Avoid the Maze with Barrett Matthews “Be Everywhere, All At Once” 1_25_23 podmatch#
https://youtu.be/rXFYDFOSjS8

Avoid the Maze with Jessie Torres_Abuse/Shame/Loss/Trauma 1_25_23 podmatch#

Avoid the Maze with Susy Lee_”Raising Kids Who Care” 1_25_23 podmatch#
https://youtu.be/RLxqweHI3Hc

Last Spring Alex made the decision to look outside of the Indians/Guardians to advance his career.  Cleveland had been very good to him for the 5 years he worked there but when advancement was not open, he knew it was time to seek outside of his comfort zone.

You may remember me announcing in the late Spring he took a job with the farm team of the NY Mets.  What he was offered upon his acceptance changed when he moved there and although he tried to make it work, he knew he was in the wrong place, and he returned home.  He began his search in July looking for the best fit – Well today it Happened – Alex is moving to Dallas, TX.

He is excited (and so are his dad and I) about this move where as Binghamton, NY was not an exciting move, but he did meet some great people there and he forged some lasting friendships.  But he will be off to the big city before this year is up and I believe 2023 has a TRIP to Dallas with my name on it.

Do you remember me sharing that we (Alex, his dad and I) were told by a Psychiatrist at the Cleveland Board of Mental Health that Alex would not graduate high school without help, he would never graduate, college and we would place him in a half-way house where he would obtain a menial job.  Well, “F” YOU Dr. Lorna – Alex said he would prove you wrong and he has – not only did he work and advance his experiences with the Guardians he was sought after by various teams; but due to the cost of moving and living he had to turn down offers.  Alex may be on spectrum but don’t tell him he is different – the only difference may be his Will to learn and be his BEST.

We are so proud of our son and always have been.  We have supported and cheered him on when others like Dr. Lorna told us to stop and give up.  Seriously – The Guardians was his stepping stone – and if you don’t believe it – I will continue to share his success …

For those of you who stopped talking to Rich and I when Alex was diagnosed in 1996 – please GO “F” yourselves…When we needed our friends and Alex needed to be accepted for being the same person he was before his diagnosis – you deserted us.

To the Bully who assaulted our son in High School and to the students and faculty who saw it happen – it’s time to come forward and apologize to Alex.  The Bully may not be around to apologize but there are plenty of YOU out there who can!!!

Back to the people we thought were our friends- you obviously weren’t!

Alex has taught our family to overcome adversity.

What is a Coach, and do you need one? 

A coach is someone who helps YOU improve Your own performance,

A good coach is someone who will guide YOU to view Your positive attributes.

Coaching is designed for YOU to adjust and make the changes You want.

What is an Advocate?

An advocate is someone who will support or recommend the assistance YOU are looking for.

An advocate will not judge or place their opinion on YOU.

An advocate will guide you through a process.

What is a Coach Advocate?

Someone like me providing podcasts to vet out your best choice /or/

Someone who understandings coaching and identifies with the needs of the client, YOU.

Someone who help you through the process expressing yourself – not about the past but about the now, and Your tomorrows.

Are you looking for a Coach?

Listen to Avoid the Maze  – we have a wide range of Coaches some have specialties like Business/Sales/Education others may help you travel your personal path or identify how your personal and professional journey may need some massaging.  Let me be your guide.

Contact me, Karen, at newclevelandradio@gmail.com – subject Coach Advocate – there is no charge to the client, YOU for my services contact me for more information.

If you are a Coach and are interested my services to vet out client leads, contact me at newclevelandradio@gmail.com so we may discuss a onetime fee.

Enjoy each moment