Surviving Grief 

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By the time we reach our 60’s and beyond, (and yes…I’m in that category), we’ve lived through things our younger selves never imagined.

We’ve celebrated weddings and birthdays. We’ve welcomed children and grandchildren. We’ve built careers, homes, friendships, and traditions that shaped who we became.

But many of us have also buried people we never wanted to say goodbye to.

A spouse. A sibling. Friends. Parents. And sometimes even a child.

Grief becomes something we carry more often as we grow older. It isn’t a sign that life’s become smaller. It’s just evidence that we’ve loved deeply.

I’ve learned something from the thousands of grieving people I’ve had the privilege of walking alongside. That healing isn’t about leaving our loved one behind. It’s about learning how to carry both love and sorrow at the same time.

As we grow older, maybe these simple reminders become even more important:

Keep loving.

Don’t let loss convince you your heart has reached its limit. There’s always room for kindness, friendship, and connection.

Keep remembering.

Speak their names. Tell their stories. Love doesn’t disappear just because someone’s no longer physically here.

Keep saying yes.

To lunch with a friend. To a walk by the ocean. To holding a grandchild’s hand. To watching another sunrise. Living isn’t a betrayal of the people we miss.

Keep asking for help.

Strength isn’t measured by how much we carry alone. Some of the bravest words we can ever say are, “I’m having a hard day.”

Keep growing.

We don’t stop becoming who we’re meant to be just because we’ve reached a certain age. There’s still room for new friendships, new purpose, new laughter, and even new dreams.

And finally…keep choosing hope.

Not because life’s been easy or because grief magically disappears. But because every new morning is another opportunity to honor the people we love by continuing to live the life we’ve been given.

Here’s the thing…growing older isn’t something to fear.

It’s a privilege that many of the people we love never had…and maybe the best way we can honor them is to keep living with the love they left behind.

Gary Sturgis

Author of: ‘SURVIVING GRIEF – 365 Days A Year’

Dear University Hospitals Patient Relations Team,

I am submitting this formal complaint to document a series of serious concerns regarding the care I received at both Ahuja Emergency Department and Main Campus Emergency Department beginning Sunday, August 9, 2026, as well as issues with the home care services arranged upon my discharge.

1. Lack of Basic Patient Safety Measures at Ahuja ER

• Upon arrival, I was placed in a room without a call button and left alone for extended periods.
• Staff frequently closed the door, leaving me isolated and unable to request help.
• During transfer between gurneys, neither gurney was locked, causing me to slip between them and experience additional pain.

Communication Barriers and Failure to Accommodate Hearing Needs

• My assigned nurse’s heavy accent combined with a face mask made communication extremely difficult.
• I informed her that I wear hearing aids, yet no effort was made to adjust communication or ensure I understood my care.
• This pattern continued throughout my stay at both facilities.

Repeated Failure to Contact My Emergency Contact

• I requested multiple times that staff contact my son, Steve Rogovin, listed in MyChart.
• I was assured this would be done, yet he never received a call at any point during my ER stay or hospitalization.
• As a recently widowed patient living alone, this lack of communication caused significant distress.

Extended Periods Without Information, Comfort Measures, or Basic Care

• After transfer to Main Campus, I was left in a hallway for approximately one hour.
• I received no updates after X-rays and CT scans, despite repeated requests.
• I was not offered water except with medication, and tissues were not provided even when requested.
• I was not given food until late afternoon on Monday, August 10, nearly 24 hours after arrival.

Inadequate Room Assignments and Lack of Communication at Hannah House

• I was placed in a semi-private room with a roommate in severe distress, making rest impossible.
• Neuro checks were performed repeatedly without explanation.
• I continued to receive no updates on my condition or treatment plan.
• Staff again failed to contact my son, even after I explained he was flying in to support me.

Unclear Diagnosis and Treatment Plan

• At Ahuja, I was told I might have a spinal fracture or pneumothorax.
• At no point during my hospitalization was I given clear information about whether these conditions were confirmed or what treatment was required.
• I remained hospitalized for several days without understanding why.

Problems with Home Care Services

• The home nurse (Latasha B., RN) arrived late, was unprepared, and could not take my vitals due to a broken blood pressure cuff.
• She appeared unsure of the purpose of her visit.
• I do not wish for her to return.
• OT services (Lynette P.) were excellent, but PT services (Francine L.) were ineffective, difficult to understand, and provided no meaningful benefit.
• I do not wish for her (Francine L.)  to return.

Systemic Concerns

Based on my experience, it appears that administrative priorities may be overshadowing patient needs. Critical issues include:

• Failure to provide call buttons
• Poor communication and lack of empathy
• Inconsistent use of patient room boards
• Repeated offering of unnecessary medication
• Lack of attention to hearing impairments and basic comfort needs

These issues created an environment that felt unsafe, dismissive, and at times inhumane.

Requested Follow‑Up

I respectfully request:

1. A formal review of the care I received at both Ahuja and Main Campus ER.
2. An explanation of the diagnostic findings related to the suspected spinal fracture and pneumothorax.
3. A review of staff communication protocols, especially regarding emergency contacts and hearing‑impaired patients.
4. A review of home care provider performance and reassignment of qualified personnel.
5. Confirmation of corrective actions taken to prevent similar experiences for future patients.

Closing

I am sharing this experience in hopes that it will lead to meaningful improvements in patient care, communication, and safety. My goal is not to criticize individual staff members but to highlight systemic issues that had a profound impact on my well‑being during a vulnerable time.

Thank you for your attention to this matter. I look forward to your response.

Sincerely, Karen (Kiki) Hale

711 Tinkers Lane

Northfield, Ohio  44067