http://postcoffeeprewine.com/posts-2020/

Donald Trump spoke today at a briefing and said the very words I posted below. Those words came out of his mouth. I suffer from depression; I tried suicide when I was 15 and a few years ago I created and compiled an entire anthology (Thank you Seal Press!) around suicide and depression and thirty-six brave & courageous, bold & fierce as all-mighty fuck humans contributed to that anthology – and I will tell you right now that his words, the ones I posted below, do not inspire or encourage or ignite hope. They instill fear and sadness and worry and worse, they instill defeat. If I have said it once, I have said it a million times, he does not deserve to be sitting in the Oval Office. He is not a leader, he is a bully, and fuck him for using the Presidency as a bully pulpit. It is up to each one of us – each and every one of us – to help every single human being who suffers from depilating depression and great sorrow and unbearable worry during this horrific health storm; to help every single human who is falling to their knees out of hopelessness, whether they are in prayer mode or collapsing under the weight of their own pain and worry, it is up to each one of us to help get through this together, and shame on him for not having the decency and humanity to inspire us, to lift us, to help carry us through this horrific and dangerous time.

Thank you

Even though I am bone tired, truly bone fucking tired I am thankfully not worrying about iKen today, so thankful that I can put that – worry – into a box & close the lid for the time being – so, I’m gonna try my best to encourage you with some good shit.

Here’s what I know, or more appropriately what I knew when I opened my eyes this morning: for three years plus now fear has been the very foundation of this travesty of a regime led by a fucking bully. The man who lives in the White House has been filling stadiums – rallies – spreading fear & hate, inciting violence, encouraging anti-semitism and sexism and misogyny and homophobia, igniting anger and vitriol. For three years he has thrown a match onto the embers and he acts and speaks and tweets with such disdain and such disregard for humanity.

And now here we are – fear manifested: we can’t touch or hug or love each other in person. We can’t visit loved ones who are sick, we can’t fly to see friends who hold our hearts in their hands, we can’t go to concerts or movies or festivals or restaurants. We can’t fall in love and hold that human – who we have waited for – in our arms. We isolate and hibernate and keep a distance. We wear masks and gloves and stand six feet apart and those who are dying from this horrific pandemic are now six feet under. Six feet, how ironic.

Here’s the good shit:

We get to wake the fuck up.

We get to wake up to our own heart, our own desires, our wants and our needs and think about what it is we want this world, our world, to look like – how we want it to look and feel and smell like. Because right now we get to sit with our own lives, our own hearts and souls and decide how we want to live from this moment on. From this moment on. Right now we get to choose a different path, choose a different mate if the one we’re with is causing us grief or abusing us, abusing the privilege of our lives; right now we get to say no, no more, to what and who causes us suffering & unwanted pain, we get to say yes to what and who we have wanted but have been afraid of wanting, right now we get to awaken that very thing that has been laying dormant in our bodies and our souls because other folks didn’t think it or us were good enough. Fuck that. Right now, while we are sitting in our homes or apartments or on a bench outside inhaling some fresh air – isolating, hibernating, keeping the world at bay, at arms length – we get to have personal time to go in deep and excavate and bring out what we have abandoned, what we left for dead, what we gave up on; that dream, that human, that creative path, that piece of writing that needs to be written or rewritten, that canvas that needs some color, the piano that needs tinkling, that song that needs to be written and sung, that dance that needs a bit more choreography, that voice that needs to be heard.

So let’s try to stop worrying incessantly – I know, almost impossible – and let’s put the fear in a corner somewhere for the time being – I know, I know, it’s the “when hell freezes over” concept – but still, let’s try and let’s find the beauty within our own lives and start thinking about who we wanna be and what we want this world to look like and how we want to live and how we wanna love because when this virus slows down and starts to retreat we – we, the humans – get to create a better world for everyone – everyone – and please, for the sake of all fuck, do not let anyone, not one soul, ever tell you again that you can’t do or be what you have dreamed of doing and being your entire life because now, right now, is the opportunity for us to stand in that truth.

The life that you led that you did not like, that no longer fit you, that needed to expand and grow but was kept in a small little box – that life you do not have to go back to; let us all create a bigger and better life because the worst that can happen is that we go back to mediocrity and the fear that is the very foundation of this Presidential regime.

Be fucking huge.

Reposted from a nurse.

Tonight is the last night that I’ll hug my kid’s goodnight until god knows when. Their things are packed and lining the hallway because tomorrow they will go to stay with my best friend and her husband.

My floor is now a main suspected Covid 19 floor and it means that the odds of being exposed over and over again are now a 100% guarantee. So I just wanted to talk to everyone stuck at home with your family, bored out of your mind and itching to get out. A little perspective is sometimes all you need to feel grateful for the things you have that others don’t.

3/24/2020- THINGS ARE GETTING WORSE
Public Service Announcement:
DON’T listen to President Trump, AKA Dr. Death.
He will get you and those you love killed.
DON’T listen to other members of his death squad, AKA his fascist administration, AKA the evil regime.
DO listen to Dr. Fauci
DO listen to Gov. Cuomo, AKA Rock Star
Do listen to Gov Newsom
Do listen to Mayor Garcetti
LOCALS:
DO listen to Rep. Harley Rouda
? Possibly listen to Huntington Beach mayor Lyn Semeta, but she’s been inconsistent, so only listen to her when she follows the advice of the experts.
In a nutshell, please feel free to listen to ANYONE who advises you to stay at home.
PS: I put most of the money from the sale of my house into the stock market, and even though I am no longer looking at balances, I know it is falling daily. Even so, lives are more important than dollars. Staying home is the only thing that will save lives. We’ll figure out the rest later.
Stay home. Stay safe. Stay healthy!
Be kind.
#FlattenTheCurve, #ItIsUpToUs, #NotDyingForWallstreet

#thankyouMicheleSamit

Perchance

Something unseen
That knows no border
Merely trying to survive
Has taken hold
And challenged us
To try to stay alive
And I wonder
At the distance we must keep
If this living
Will change the way we love
And sleep
And dance and trust
And count our worth
If the time is ripe
To pay the price
Of our hubris here, on Earth
So,
For those who may survive
If the rebuild for tomorrow
Is crafted by important men of note
Citing hopelessness and sorrow
As bandied items of the day
And war and hate and enterprise
Are the shrines to which they pray
We will have wasted our fair warning
Even the least schooled can plainly see
That the way we humans live
Is not the way life’s meant to be

My friend Suzanne Kulperger wrote this and I am sharing her & her words – because her words ring so true and go so deep and because, well, I love her to pieces.

“There are days when you stand up for yourself and or the people that you love, and you end up getting slammed.

There are days where you set boundaries, even though you’re scared, and end up relaxing them because the fallout from a confrontation is more upsetting to your peace of mind than holding your ground.

Alex Bevan writes 12/18/19

It’s only about 600 yards to the lake from our driveway at the end of the street… I can hear the lake rumbling and churning from here… i imagine the wind at the shore will be brutal… but I’m putting on my heavy coat and wrapping up and shooting for a walk to the little park at the end of the lane.. …. but I think I hear the voice of the Lion from the Wizard of Oz saying, ‘Somebody talk me out of it!!!”,….. lol…. good morning… y’all be safe!

On June 21, 1941, despite a World War going on, my mother and father who met at a mutual cousin’s wedding in 1940, said their “I do’s!”  My parents were married for sixty-three years until the passing of my Pops in 2004.  If mom and dad were here to celebrate us today, Pops would be 102 and my mother 99, and this would be a spectacular 78^th Wedding Anniversary.  However, Mom and Dad are up in the heavens together and so through some magical force, the love and compassion I hold in my heart for them, I am making my connection in the only way I know, how, sharing them with you.

Sixty-three years is an amazing tribute for their love.  Although my parents were dubbed, The Bickersons, despite their loud (not screaming) conversations became a running family gag that they were there own sitcom.  The stories my parent’s shared about their meeting at a wedding was kismet, even though my mother played hard to get; she was not sure Jay Harmon Moss was her Prince Charming.  My father continued to pursue Dorothy Friedman since his own mother thought she was a damn good catch.

My parents didn’t have the easiest life, but they managed to make it through the perils of Ups and Downs.  They taught my brothers, Gary and Joel, as well as myself, to keep reaching for the stars.  Now that I look back over the years, we may not be the richest family, but we are wealthy in memories.  Our memories are what propel each of us forward.  The world may not look beautiful right now with political storms and with mother nature’s in rage, but we are survivors as we learned our lessons well.

On this June 21^st, 2019, the first official day of Summer, I am thinking of my loving parents with a heart full of joy.  If I could thank them for giving me life and the opportunity to share the sunrise and sunset with others, I would do so with much love and gratitude.

Happy Anniversary D’vasha & Hunkle!