Don’t Call Me a Widow – Part 71

I’m Getting Out Today!

After another restless night, I’m actually excited this morning — excited for a long, hot shower to ease the tension in my body and excited to get dressed and leave the house. Thanks to Joan, who kindly offered to drive me to an appointment, today feels like a small but meaningful step back into the world.

If you’ve been following my series, you already know I’ve been struggling with my current hearing aids. Today I’m heading to Costco to explore their hearing aid program, which is not only affordable but consistently rated as reliable. After that, Joan and I will meet up with our mutual friend Donna for a girls’ lunch.

Honestly, I feel like a kid about to walk into a candy store — eyes wide, heart buzzing. It’s been two weeks since I’ve been out among people, and the anticipation is exhilarating.

Sometimes the simplest things — a shower, an errand, a lunch with friends — can turn lonely days into moments of pure joy.

I’ve learned a great deal about myself over these past two weeks. For most of my life, people told me I was a strong person, and I never truly believed them. Instead, I carried an inner sense of isolation — a feeling that others had let me down. The strength they saw in me felt more like a weight I was forced to shoulder, and I grew more independent without ever fully understanding the layers of emotion beneath it. I even resented people, including Rich, for insisting I was strong when all I wanted was for someone else to be the strong one for me.

The truth is, Rich and so many others have always been there for me. I was simply too focused on what I thought I had to manage, too wrapped up in responsibility, to notice the support surrounding me. This accident has shown me something I needed to see I am not alone, even in the moments when I’m physically sitting by myself in my home or in a hospital room.

But two weeks ago, life handed me a lesson I could no longer ignore. Rich — and everyone who believed in me — were right. I do have the strength to be OK.

If I could offer one gift today, it would be the ability to look beyond your own limits and reach out to someone. Even when you’re convinced you have no one, there is always someone. Connection exists — sometimes in places we haven’t thought to look, sometimes in people we haven’t yet allowed ourselves to trust.

988 is the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline – you may not be suicidal, but you may be in Crisis – call for help. (you can text the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by texting 988, or text the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741. Both options are free, confidential, available 24/7, and staffed by people ready to listen even if you just need to vent or talk through a rough moment.)

If you are a senior 866-243-5678 here in Ohio you can contact the Department of Aging and be connected to local groups that may assist you.

Here is something called Friendship Line – 7 days a week at 1-800-971-0016. Aging at 415-750-4111. 24-Hour Hotline/Warmline 1-800-971-0016.

When you reach out to friends or family, begin with openness and honesty. When we feel deeply alone, it’s easy for our words to come out sounding hurt or accusatory, even when what we truly want is empathy and understanding. Starting the conversation with clarity and gentleness gives others a chance to meet us where we are.

It also helps to remember that everyone has limitations. A “no” doesn’t always mean someone doesn’t care — sometimes it simply means they can’t offer what we’re asking for in that moment. Accepting that truth can soften disappointment and keep the door open for connection.

And sometimes, without realizing it, we slip into the role of the victim. Others may sense it even when we don’t. That’s when reaching out to supportive professionals — your medical provider, clergy, or community organizations — can make a real difference. Keep looking. Support is out there, and you will find it.

If you’re reading this, it means you’re already seeking connection through social media or the internet. There are resources, communities, and people ready to meet you. You have the power to turn today into the beginning of a better tomorrow.

Join me on my journey (and yours) #yesican Coaching with Karen

Kh.yesican1@gmail.com