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60 years ago my Baube, Ida Olshansky Friedman, passed away, I was just nine years old. Just days before I was in the car, my mom was taking Baube and Zayde on errands, and when we dropped them off at their apartment at Blackstone Manor, Baube promised they would see me for my birthday on March 4th. However, I never saw Baube again. She suffered a massive stroke the day before my 9th birthday and passed on March 9th, 1959. Tonight according to Jewish tradition is her Yarzheit, I will light a memorial candle that will shine for 24 hours to remember her. (The Yarzheit date is based on the Jewish date of passing.)
March 9th has another solemn significance as well, my father-in-law very much a father to me, passed away in 1987. Edwin Peter Hale hung on through my birthday barely able to wish me a Happy Day, but in his humorous way congratulated me on my 39th year, two years early. I will be 39 forever, thank you, dear Mr. Ed.
The loss may stay with us forever. However, it is time that allows us to look back and appreciate the love and special moments we were able to spend with one another. As a young child, I spent many days with my Baube and Zayde. I use to call them my old fashion grandparents as they never learned how to drive a car, and they share stories of the old country, Russia. My zayde read the Yiddish paper (in Yiddish) and sprinkled Yiddish into his English conversations. My Baube always appeared more American at least in my company she spoke only English. She was a short, plump lady who could give you that soft loving hug even from across the room (or in your memories.) She was a cook, a baker, but not a candlestick maker. I loved her (and still do) despite our short time together.
My father-in-law was only in my life for a short time. He also taught me love and share big bear hugs along with words of wisdom that he learned in the school of hard knocks. Edwin was a gentle giant, and I am so blessed to call him father!
So today I remember life as it was 60 years ago and also 32 years ago and I hold their memories close to my heart and share with you that they were two special people who guided me on my path to today.
Time does heal sadness and loss; it doesn’t take it away it provides us a way to hold it near and dear with fewer tears and more smiles as we see the shadows that provide us strength.
It is Sunday, for many considered a day of rest that may consist of sleeping late into the late morning or early afternoon hours. Years ago, Sunday was my lazy day, waking up to a new week, brunching or lunching with my husband, running errands in joyous harmony to GOLD CIRCLE™, prior to the TARGET™, days. We always found a bargain or two while picking up the essentials like toilet paper, napkins, laundry soap as well other fine household items we didn’t need. As we sauntered through the aisles we knew at the end of this weekly journey we would take our stash home and realize we forgot the most important item of the week, but we never identified what that item was!
Remember Yesterday – Live for Today
Those were the days when we first bought the Sunday newspaper, The Plain Dealer™, and cut out the coupons and checked out what was on sale before we stepped inside the doors of our Sunday retreat. The newspaper was more golden than the GOLD CIRCLE™. The Sunday edition was packed full of fun stuff like the comics in living color, and Parade Magazine™ that was sure to have a story of fun-filled information for reading, not scanning. That paper went to breakfast with us, and we staled out our time as did many weeding through the paper from the front page headlines to the comics, magazines, ads, and flyers. Great articles appeared in The Plain Dealer™, Jane Scott, Michael Heaton, Connie Schultz, Terry Pluto, and my friend Chuck Yarborough, just to name a few.
“Sunday, Sunday here again in tidy attire
You read the color supplement, the TV guide”
Today, Sunday is just another day, working; as most of us have more than one job in today’s economic debacle. I feel blessed as I am about to reach the big 69 tomorrow that I am able and capable to be on my feet supporting sales and earning a few extra dollars. I do this because I have learned through my upbringing that we must continue to venture through life and not only adapt to changes but to change for the betterment without bitterness. I may have been raised in the 50s and 60s with the voice of encouragement telling me that if I worked hard, I too would have a suburban home, two cars in the garage and much more than just a chicken in the pot. However, to maintain all that I was encouraged to work hard for comes with a price.
Appreciating Yourself so Others will Too!
I could complain that as I reach this pinnacle in life that I am still scratching and clawing to build a better lifestyle (not necessarily all financial), that will allow me to live fully. That lifestyle includes working on Saturday and Sunday and meeting new people and supporting their wants and needs providing guidance. My weekend gig is much like my weekday life with newclevelandradio.net, I work with various individuals, and I am their guide and support in sharing their message, compassion, and life providing us all options on which fork in the road will lead us to Sunday, the first day of the week.
Treat Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday
As the Days to Love Yourself and Wish Yourself
A Happy Birthday
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME
I could blame Charlie Wiener for the fact that I am wide awake at 4:33 a.m., on a Sunday morning. However, it is because of Charlie that I am filled with the enthusiasm that life provides. I am cherishing his writings in, American Stories, just as I did in the sequel, Carrie Come to Me Smiling.
Like the character Kim, we all have lived a life that too often we look back on and say; it’s not enough; my existence means nothing. We may think that everyone is succeeding while we are barely capable to tread water. Our accomplishments whether little or big have been buried in the crevices of our brain and we do not acknowledge them. Instead for many of us, myself include, spelled in all CAPITAL LETTERS, wake up one day and ask is this LIFE?
Sadly for some, they run away from all that they have created, accomplished, and achieved, and try to start anew. The truth is we cannot run away from ourselves, but we can learn from the past and remold ourselves. We, you and I are the designers of this moment in time. Nothing will change for the better or worse unless we mold the clay, pick up a paintbrush and add some color to the landscape or sketch out the inner feelings that may be holding us back from appreciating the beauty of life.
Some people wait until an event in their life rings a bell and allows the freedom to choose. The bell may be a lottery winning or a diagnosis of what we may refer to as “ill”-fate. The reality is a lottery winning may cause other ill-fated issues, whereas a diagnosis of dying is something we all live with from the moment we are born. For some the end comes sooner than for others, but, it is up to each of us to make the most of each day and to not squander it away.
Our world is filled with books that tell stories some are fictional others are based on facts, research, and emotional concepts. Reading can provide us with inspiration and a road map. The road map is not going to be a straight line; it will have curves and ups and downs and detours as well as roadblocks. However, it is up to us as the intelligent life form to find our way, not allowing the walls to close in on us.
Kim, the character in American Stories is on a path collecting stories, and although the strangers she meets are as different from her as night is to day, there is a commonality. The commonality is that we are all trying to find, the comfort of peace within ourselves so we may enjoy the beauty that surrounds us. This is what empowers me to share my journey with you and to create a platform where we come together as different individuals finding our sameness. Charlie has captured my soul in his writing; I feel as if he is writing about me as well as you!
Empower yourself to live. It is Sunday, February 24th, 2019, do not waste another minute. My dear friend, Norman Tischler lived life to the fullest. The riches he recently left behind are the people whom he touched, whether with his music, his words, a bear hug, or just a look that said, “I love you!” I now belong to a world of strangers who are friends by association and the enthusiasm of being part of the story!
As I read American Stories, by K. Adrian Zonneville, aka Charlie Weiner, I now know that these books were written for a much deeper purpose than Charlie will ever understand, nor will I. You see, when I chose to really live my life, not just go through the motions, I became interested in helping others in a manner in which my future would be enriched. Enrichment is not in the form of financial gain, although a little extra in the pocket and bank might provide a little less of a burden, the love and friendships I am adding into my experiences here on earth are much more valuable.
As a young child, from the age of 9 or 10 years old, I struggled with making friends and being accepted. Just prior to puberty I became gawky and unsure of myself. I wanted so much to be part of the IN GROUP I literally pushed myself out of the inner circles. However, looking back with hindsight, I was not totally on the fringe, I was somewhere between the core and edge, and if I had known what empowerment was, I may be a different person today.
My desire to be part of the click ate at my soul and caused me many embittered thoughts that I carried on my back that weighed me down. I allowed my pre-pubescent years to hold me in a place that was not safe. I did creep out of that maze of feelings throughout my life, but I kept getting pulled back like I was tethered to that time. However, within the last five years I cut the teether and have begun running through the maze of life with hands up over my head, and every once in a while you may actually hear my shouts of ‘Glee.’
Reading American Stories, I understand that my mission in life is to experience and guide and be guided. I am no longer living with clouded eyes and heart, I am open to awareness, and that is what empowers me. I have no guarantees as to what tomorrow will bring, but I have the control to make each moment my best. I must continue to breathe in the life that guides me!
I have just begun reading, American Stories, by one of my newest favorite authors, Charlie Weiner, aka, K. Adrain Zonnerville. It always takes me a chapter plus to get mesmerized by his storytelling and descriptions of life as seen and approached by his characters. This morning, waking early, as usual, I picked up the book and began my day reading. I stopped at the point when the main character identifies that she is a collector of sorts. She collects stories! I realized at that moment in time why this book as well as the sequel that I read first, speak to me. I too am a collector, not of stories, but of people.
Don’t get nervous; I am not collecting people and keeping them bound up. I am collecting people, like you, and me and encouraging them to live free, sing, dance, and express themselves in the medium that provides them joy. I am not a Pollyanna and do not expect that happiness means never feeling sad, angry, unappreciated, or any negativity. What I do expect at least from myself is to face each obstacle with as much positive energy to move around it or through it when the Wonder Woman in me pushes onward.
I have spent the better part of my almost 69 years trying to be like you, and I now know, I want to be me. I once believed in the lyrics sung by Frank Sinatra, “All of me Come on get all of me Can’t you see I’m just a mess without you…” Spending one’s life trying to fit in when you feel like the square peg in the round hole, is not living. However, lessons can be learned, and one day you may wake up and become a collector of sorts. As I gather new friends and revive relationships with old friends, I appreciate how precious life is. It is a gift to follow our journey and share our experiences. We are all guides in this amazing universe.
Although Carrie, the main character in American Stories may be dying, in reality, she is alive. She teaches us that death does not have to destroy; it can be a lesson that teaches us how to fulfill dreams and appreciate each other. By taking one step in front of another, we can create a path that provides us joy as we journey forward.
Join me here at newclevelandradio.net as we continue to podcast and provide you with opportunities. Let us become empowered to appreciate our strengths!
February has many fine meanings for me. First, it’s the month before my birth month. It’s a short month, and soon it will be Spring, that makes me smile a lot. However, this month is full of challenges that could be obstacles.
Tomorrow, February 2nd, Puxatawney Phil sticks his head out of the ground, looks for his shadow, and always, without question announces six more weeks of winter. Winter not being my favorite season, especially this past week with sub-zero temperatures, I am not to keen on listening to his premonition for the end of winter.
On February 3, 1984, my best friend, my partner, became my husband. We had a private ceremony on that day. Although we had every intention to marry, we married on that day to prove to a custody judge that our relationship was legitimate and retaining custody of my oldest son was appropriate. Although this is a day to celebrate, we chose to have a wedding with all the trimmings in July of that same year, to share with friends and family, not for maintaining custody. However, 20 years to the day, my POPs passed away. Now that day and date are filled with a rush of emotions. Additionally this year on said date, I will be attending a Memorial Service (Funeral) for a cherished musician who recently befriended me.
February 4 for most of my life was a great day, my favorite cousin, Gloria celebrated her birthday just four weeks prior to mine. As soon as I was old enough to send her cards or call her to wish her a happy day, my yearly routine included this very special girl. In my mind, she will always be the cute petite cousin who I looked up to with respect and so much love. Sadly, my Gloria passed away just weeks before my mother in 2016. I am blessed to still be in touch with her children and grandchildren keeping that connection alive and bright.
February 14th has never been special in my past. I was not the young girl in high school or college with boys or a boy sending me flowers, and or professing love for me. Although my husband of 35 year treats me special every day, Valentine’s Day is just another day in our lives. Rich refuses to be nice to me for just one day! (I am blessed.)
One reason I loved this short month is that my mother was a Leap Year Baby. It became a standing joke that not only was my mother shorter than all of her children; she was also younger in birthdays! When mom died on October 11, 2016, she was 96 in years but 24 in Birthdays. (Don’t worry, we never let her go a year without a celebration, she enjoyed birthday wishes on the 28th of February and the 1st of March.)
So as this month begins I will face it head-on. Each day is another step closer to my favorite seasons, Spring, Summer & Fall. Join me in sharing memories that will warm us adding sunshine and smiles into our lives. We are not guaranteed a future, that is why we must live in the present!
If you leave in Cleveland, Ohio or any other Midwest or Northern state having a snowstorm is not unusual this time of year. It’s funny, growing up in Detroit, Michigan, we had a lot of snow in the winter. much more than what we have today, and yet we never stopped. But many of us here are hunkered down. My Beetle will not make it out of the garage the snow is so deep, and my condo sub-division has no idea when we will get plowed. Alex’s car is under siege by the snow, and there is a layer of ice under the snow. I guess back in the day we had warmer clothing, studs on our tires and a STUDDLY BURLY guy in our home or down the block who was always available and able to shovel someone out. I’m not complaining but sharing how soft so many of us have become, myself included.
Four years ago I fell on the ice during the winter and broke my femur requiring surgery and two weeks in rehab. I refuse to put myself in that same position. Therefore I am willing to be soft! But with softness comes empowerment and my theme for today is empowering myself to accept what is! When we empowered we give ourselves the opportunity to become stronger and more confident in our choices. For me, I am making choices that make me happy without contributing to someone else’s unhappiness.
A special thanks to Candace Pollock of the Intentionality Gurus, Candace has guided me through her bi-weekly podcast with newclevelandradio.net to listen to my overactive brain and allow my heart and soul to respond, if necessary. The words, “if necessary” is my personal mantra, not everything is necessary just because my thoughts dictate it at the moment.[i]
Katie the Carlady soon to be podcasting with newclevelandradio.net. Katie will be bringing coffee and cars to our venue. Katie’s backstory has been a journey that has led her to be an influential individual for many, and many of those individuals may never have met her. She is full of energy and brings out the best in others. I have only known Katie for a year, and yet I am mesmerized by her. For the first time in my life I am not wishing to be her, but to capture her dynamism and light my drive.
CANCER SUCKS, and I hope I will never have to experience the cobblestone path Melinda has traveled. However, she brightens my smile and my approach to health and wellness. Melinda posts Facebook Live moments regarding the “Heart Mojo,” the spirit and words she will share in her upcoming podcasts in February! Melinda as well as Katie, and Candace will be joining me in a new venture that kicks off this Wednesday night.
Please join us, Wednesday, January 23rd, 2019, at Vista Springs, Greenbriar, in Parma, Ohio. We will be hosting a Meet & Greet for women and men that have a story (personal journey) to share that will enlighten the lives of others. It’s time for each one of us to shed the angst from the fall out around us and seek a path that will allow us to live with heart. We must let our heart and soul fill our brain with the peace and lightness we all deserve. Please feel free to join us at 6 pm – 8:30 pm where Vista Springs will host the event, bringing us together for the “Empowerment Journey.”
The “Empowerment Journey,” this is your chance to share, learn, and be the person you want to be.
[i] (https://www.spreaker.com/show/the-intentionality-gurus-with-candace-2018) & (https://www.spreaker.com/show/the-intentionality-gurus-candace-2019)
2019 will be bringing you some new podcasts as well as a return of, Senior Moments with Bradley & Heather Greene. We are waiting with great anticipation to welcome them back after a hiatus.
Katie O’Toole Smith will be joining newclevelandradio.net, sharing the message that “all things are possible!” It’s more than a saying or a spiritual belief. “If you give up it means you never tried,” and with the support of others, there is no reason not to try! (First show is scheduled for Thursday, February 14, 2019, @ 6 pm EST)
Melinda Smith will share thoughts on positivity and not in a cheesy condescending way, but woman-to-woman, person-to-person. It’s not about right or wrong; it’s about facing challenging and creating new opportunities. As Helen Kellet stated, “Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.” (First show is scheduled for Monday, February 11, 2019, @ 6 pm EST) MY HEART MOJO
It is this poem by Edgar Guest that my pops repeatedly quoted that encourages me to face each challenge as an opportunity!
Somebody said that it couldn’t be done
But he with a chuckle replied
That “maybe it couldn’t,” but he would be one
Who wouldn’t say so till he’d tried.
So he buckled right in with the trace of a grin
On his face. If he worried he hid it.
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it!
Somebody scoffed: “Oh, you’ll never do that;
At least no one ever has done it;”
But he took off his coat and he took off his hat
And the first thing we knew he’d begun it.
With a lift of his chin and a bit of a grin,
Without any doubting or quiddit,
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it.
There are thousands to tell you it cannot be done,
There are thousands to prophesy failure,
There are thousands to point out to you one by one,
The dangers that wait to assail you.
But just buckle in with a bit of a grin,
Just take off your coat and go to it;
Just start in to sing as you tackle the thing
That “cannot be done,” and you’ll do it.
I am so proud to share that my oldest son, Steve Rogovin, he is now a part owner in a new restaurant in Chicago. “Brothers and Sisters.” https://www.chicagotribune.com/dining/ct-food-brothers-and-sisters-opening-soon-20181018-story.html
Steve is also a practicing attorney with the law firm, MPSLaw in Chicago.
If you find yourself in the Chicago area, please check out, “Brothers and Sisters.” Brothers and Sisters, 2119 W. Chicago Ave., www.brothersandsisters.fun
Please do not ask someone why they are anxious or depressed, often they cannot provide themselves with an explanation so why assume they will be able to communicate with you? Anxiety is normal it is part of the flight or fight process. Without a touch of anxiety, we could place ourselves in harm’s way walking up to roaring Lion or crossing the railroad track as a train comes towards us at full speed. However, anxiety that produces dread for seconds, minutes or longer can interfere with our normal routines. I know I went through this five years ago. Up until that time I pushed and prodded through often with tears and mood swings blaming it on trivial things like a broken nail, I gained a few pounds, or I was not included in an invitation. Oh whoa was me! However, those situations were just the triggers, they weren’t the reason, and sometimes we never figure out the whys!
Anxiety can affect us all in different ways including irritable bowel, obsessive-compulsive needs, and migraines, just to name a few obvious ones. In my case IB and Migraines are my malady and recently (over the past few weeks) I have had an increase in Migraine attacks along with this on again, off again of foreboding. My fear is my anxiety will deepen and take me into depression and I won’t and can’t have that as part of my journey.
The series that I am planning for 2019 will not only help me face the demons that invaded my thought pattern, but it will bring me closer to others while I share my story I will listen to theirs. It is only in this common thread of true and open communication that we can face this disease head-on. Yes, anxiety and depression by medical terminology are diseases, and although they do not need to be terminal without support, understanding, and acceptance, for some, it is life-threatening.
This week has been difficult despite the love, friendship and support of family and friends. However, please know there is still a brewing demon called anxiety living within in me, and I must become more intentional in my thoughts and living to extinguish what is not needed for survival.